Overwhelmed? Relief is Within You.

“I can’t think straight.” “I’m exhausted.” “Little things feel like big things.” “I’m impatient.” “I haven’t eaten all day.” “I’m not doing anything well.” “Sometimes I think I should walk away and open a coffee shop.”

Leaders of all levels I’m working with are sharing moments as these, vibrating in overwhelm at times. No surprise. As a humanity, in systems and in the world, there’s turmoil and light all in one day. It’s hard to balance demands and stressors in our external environments, let alone quiet the noise to hear what our internal beings are asking for.

We hear of mindfulness practices and grounding techniques. They sound good, but often dismissed or forgotten. Some techniques are within reach in the moment, take seconds to minutes and enable us to go from being “offline” (when our animal brains light up in fight, flight, freeze and fawn) to being “online” (centered, focused, clear).

The grounding technique here is an example of how easy it can be. If you need this today, try it, let me know what you notice in yourself. Or, share an example of an alternative technique you love that works for you.

We’re going to encounter bumps in the days. We can offer ourselves relief with ease, access and, significant benefits when we listen to the cues.

#livewithfervor #leadwithfervor #fervornuggetsoftruth #nervoussystems #healthiswealth #traumainformedcoaching #mindfulness #consciousleadership

Trauma: It Doesn’t Define Us But Can Inform How We Choose to Live and Lead.

I believe we all come with a story that shapes who we become in the world, consciously or unconsciously. We never know what brought someone to this day, the trials and triumphs, and for so many, trauma. We have tendencies to judge and react to others when they get avoidant, controlling, emotive, or otherwise. What if we consider that their trauma may be activated, their nervous systems have lit up, and cognition is impaired by nature of being in survival mode? Yes, it happens at work and in life, day-to-day. Whether you notice this in others, or, in yourself, what might need to be tended to?

“Trauma isn’t what happens to you, it is what happens inside you,” says Dr Gabor Maté. He also shares it’s what doesn’t happen that should happen. Interpret as you will in your own context, or considering someone you know in your personal or professional life.

We, and others around us can be activated by any number of lived experiences that impact how we show up in our leadership, with our teams and peers, in our personal lives, and in the world. As The Minds Journal shares in the graphic here, the potential stimuli for activation is extensive.

Growing awareness, discovering new ways of being, learning how to recover and prevent activations that lead to pain and, unintended consequences can be the very basis for trauma-informed healing, coaching, or alternative modalities. There are options. If you want to learn of some, ask me. Or, look for credible partners like me, with trauma-informed credentials.

Consider when activated, might there be some unsuspecting gift in the messages your nervous system is trying to tell you? And how might you support someone you see is suffering?

There is so much discovery, resourcefulness, recovery, and prevention that’s possible, when we come together in safe, informed, trusting spaces.

Yours in healing and fervor, of course,

Eva

Pithy Musings 20: “The Power of Ikigai” with David Marlow

Countless leaders and organizations are talking about the notion of purpose, also referred to as Ikigai in Japanese, meaning “reason for being”. Some say that digging into this work can be transformative for individuals, teams and organizations.

Fervor agrees! Declaring purpose and top values has led to incredibly fulfilling work, fabulous relationships with clients, meaningful and valuable contributions. Yet there are risks, rewards, and principles to consider for success.

With immense joy, we are joined by the renowned Ikigai Guy and founder of VLURU LLC, David E. Marlow who shares his own definition of Ikigai, his personal journey with it, and wisdom so many of us can learn from. The best part? David is a downright gracious human being. It’s no wonder he led well in Fortune 500 companies, and with Vluru, has coached and mentored hundreds of people.

If you’re ready to get serious about your own Ikigai as a leader, for your team and/or organization, this episode is for you!

Please join Caroline Berglund, David and I for this special and timely conversation into 2023, episode 20, “The Power of Ikigai” with David Marlow.

Listen or watch the episode on Spotify or YouTube!

Stay pithy and keep musing, on purpose!

With fervor,

Eva

 

Pithy Musings 19: “Let’s talk about grief at work” Part Two with Christine Mack-Granger & Cindy Lan

“Love never dies… we are all here walking each other home.” – Cindy Lang

Relationships associated with loss vary. Whether a person, another living species, or a shift in health or circumstances, how do we navigate grief as individuals? How do we support those we care for as they suffer from loss? And what about handling all of this at work?

We so often stifle our thoughts and feelings when it comes to grief, and that’s precisely why we wanted to do a “Part Two” on “Grief at Work”, because it’s a place we share so much time, space and social interaction. It’s a place where we need more understanding, compassion, and support.

Please join Caroline Berglund and I for Pithy Musings Episode 19 with return guest Christine Mack-Granger, BComm, CPHR, ACC, CEC an experienced grief facilitator, HR leader and accredited coach, who “brings a buddy”! Honoured to have Cindy J. Lang, RSW with us too, a seasoned grief facilitator, Registered Social Worker and Ontological Coach.

They dig into the cycles of grief, normalize how we might experience these and debunk topical myths. The vulnerability is raw and real as they share their own human experiences in grief. They touch on support ideas at the individual level and in helping others.

Episode 19 and more are here on the Pithy Musings YouTube channel and Spotify! Be sure to subscribe and follow us for more.

Until next time, stay pithy and keep musing!


With fervor,
Eva

Pithy Musings 18: “Let’s talk about grief at work” Part One with Christine Mack-Granger

Grief, while completely natural, is uncomfortable for us both in experiencing it, and supporting others in it. Many of us don’t know what to say or do. It feels hard all around. At work especially, we tend to avoid it at the times people most need to know they’re not alone. Grief is also something all of us have or will be touched by.

How do we handle grief at work? What do we need to know if experiencing or supporting others in it? Why we do avoid sitting with grief? Are we fundamentally afraid of emotions around grief? How might we create more space for it, from workplace policies to interpersonal relations?

“Emotion is not weakness, it’s about love,” says Pithy Musings’ latest guest Christine Mack-Granger, an experienced volunteer grief facilitator with a major Canadian health authority, a senior HR leader and accredited coach. She continues, “when (people in grief) are acknowledged, they will rise”.

Join us for Pithy Musings Episode 18 on YouTube or Spotify, as Christine debunks grief myths, shares support ideas and resources that can serve us at work, in life overall, and in loss. Join us for this heart-centered and important topic.

Want to get pithy and muse with us? Write me! We’re looking for more wise humans who are actively contributing to a healthier humanity through leadership and culture at work for upcoming episodes.

Yours with fervor,

Eva

Pithy Musings Episode 17: “Human Interaction is a Vulnerable Activity” with Timothy R. Clark

Stretching comfort zones is how we roll on Pithy Musings. More and more, we’re inviting guests we believe are some of the wisest humans out there.

Caroline Berglund and I just next levelled our courage in Episode 17 in what we refer to as one of the richest, enlightening, and humbling conversations yet with Timothy R. Clark, Ph.D., founder, and CEO of LeaderFactor. Clark is also the author of five books including The 4 Stages of Psychological Safety, and published many times over in the likes of Harvard Business ReviewForbes and Fast Company.

“Humans can smell intent”, shares Clark. What truly drives each of us as leaders? What’s at the underbelly of motivation in our teams and organizations? What constitutes a safe versus unsafe environment? What is the anatomy of culture, truly? We explore these questions and more, anchored in our new ‘Top 5 questions for wise humans’.

Want to enable a healthier humanity through leadership and culture at work? Pithy Musings is made for you, so don’t miss this one or future episodes.

Episode 17 is newly released on YouTube  and Spotify!

Catch future episodes by subscribing on YouTube and following on Spotify.

Thoughts, feedback? Welcomed! Meantime, stay pithy and keep musing!

With fervor (of course),

Eva

Pithy Musings Episode 16: “Being a Force for Change” with Michael Bungay Stanier

Are you a leader and fellow human who wants to be a force for positive change?

What a delight to have Michael Bungay Stanier join us for Episode 16, “Being a Force for Change”. Accomplished with books as The Coaching Habit, How to Begin, The Advice Trap and his own podcast, 2 Pages with MBS, this is an enlightening exploration, to say the least!

We start off with some chair dancing (a must), and dig right into our new “Top 5 Questions for Wise Humans”, and more. From sharing favourite podcasters to insights on the future of humanity, lovingly challenging us all on slips as confirmation bias, and tackling the eulogy test question most humbly, Michael is thoughtful, curious, and gracious. We even left with homework!

Join Caroline Berglund and I for this round with Michael Bungay Stanier, author, speaker, founder and philosopher. Grab a cuppa, check out the many perspectives and humility Michael offers us all in this episode.

Subscribe for more coming in on the Pithy Musings YouTube channel, and follow us on Spotify.

Thank you for being sources of inspiration John Green, Hank GreenCarolyn CoughlinJennifer Garvey BergerAaron DignanCher Brasok, Kevin Kelly, and Mary Oliver.

Thoughts, feedback? Love it all! Meantime, stay pithy and keep musing!

With a whole lot of fervor,

Eva

Pithy Musings Episode 15: “Burnout – Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes” with Cher Brasok

In a fatigued world trying to heal from the complexity of the pandemic, trying to find our way for what’s next, there’s suffering. So much of the world is burnt out. There are big costs to humanity, relationships and systems.

Burnout is pervasive in so many cultures and subcultures. It’s at times dismissed, rationalized, and even inspired by perceived reward.

As guest Cher Brasok, Founder of Connect to Your Calm and Wellness Facilitator offers, “we’re conditioned to live in chronic stress”. In Cher’s work, she wants to “challenge the myth that self worth is based on our productivity, and beliefs we have about ourselves that drive our behaviour”, from pleasing to achieving and beyond.

In this personal, candid exploration with Caroline Berglund and Eva Van Krugel of Fervor Leadership Coaching and Consulting, Cher helps us understand the distinction between stress and burnout and some misconceptions and signs of burnout. And if want to do something about it, Cher offers actionable, short- and long-term strategies to mitigate, slow and even prevent burnout as individuals. Some ideas are also shared for organizations to consider.

Ready to slow the burn? Tune into Episode 15 to learn what you can do to manifest change from within.

Watch on the Pithy Musings YouTube Channel or, listen on Spotify

Share thoughts, questions, ideas! All welcomed. Until next time, stay pithy and keep musing!

With love (and lots of fervor of course!),

Eva

Pithy Musings Episode 14: “My body saved my life” with Casey Berglund

In a world thick with overwhelm, burnout, depression, pain, trauma and war, is it possible to stop coping through addictive habits and shift consciousness through deeper connection to one’s body?

According to Casey Berglund, Founder of Worthy and Well, and creator of the Let Your Body Lead TEDx Talk, embodiment practices offer essential pathways to transition from disembodiment to unveiling inner genius, purpose, and positive possibilities for people – and the world. Leaders, entrepreneurs, humans of all kinds are capable of tuning into this inner wisdom and way of living and leading. The impact? Profound.

What’s the secret code? “You need to love it (your body) for it to guide you,” says Casey.

Learn why leaning into embodiment matters through Casey’s own very personal and candid journey to today. Begin to discover what’s possible for your own way of living through this soul- and heart-centred exploration.

Join Caroline Berglund, Casey Berglund and I for Episode 14: “My body saved my life” to learn why love for our bodies is not only central to embodiment, but how to begin leading with it.

On YouTube (click subscribe for future episodes!) and Spotify! Share comments, questions, we’d love to hear what sparks for you!

Until next time, stay pithy and keep musing!

With love and a whole lot of fervor,

Eva 

Pithy Musings Episode 13: “Call people in, not out,” a courageous conversation on DEI with Dionn Schaffner

Diversity, Equity and Inclusion (DEI) is on the minds of countless people who experience pain because of attacks, microaggressions and bias, and those who want to contribute to much-needed, positive change.

It’s a complex topic that brings about all sorts of behaviours. Some avoid it, others lean into it with courage and empathy, and others fight it with aggression.

For those exploring, “what’s my role in DEI?”, this Pithy Musings episode is for you. Whether at work, or as a human in your community, we can learn and contribute to moving DEI forward. With countless resources to contribute to a much-needed evolution in DEI, where do we begin?

Join my co-host Caroline Berglund and I for this powerful conversation with deeply knowledgeable and committed leader in DEI, Dionn Schaffner, Chief Diversity Officer of Aurea Software. Dionn brings a dynamic, kind, informed voice to unpacking DEI, what it means, actions that support each dimension. She helps us to understand what it means to “call people out vs in”. She also offers an informed model that can be used by leaders in organizations, as well as each of us as humans in everyday life to live into.

It’s an action-packed episode, well worth investing precious time to learn with.

Join us for this courageous conversation on the Pithy Musings YouTube and Spotify channels.

Subscribe or follow to be sure you don’t miss future episodes!

Until next time, stay pithy and keep musing!

With love and fervor (of course),

Eva